Compliance requires a soul appraisal.
Credits cannot be issued before your soul has been formally appraised. This is not bureaucracy for its own sake. It is bureaucracy for our sake.
Minor Corruption Marketplace
Find the small wrong thing, then decide who deserves it.
Everything here is beneath Hell's dignity, which is precisely why it sells. Browse by department, inspect whatever looks like it already knows your name, then use it yourself or assign it to someone else. The balance stays 666 throughout. Spending it is simply more evidence.
Flagged on your file
We took the liberty of pre-judging you.
The Queue Selection Hex
Ensures the selected line contains the invisible complication.
- Hex certificate
- 666 credits
- Lore, terms, assignment
The shop floor
Six departments. One regrettable mission statement.
Filed by motive first, then by the part of your life it spoils. Management insists this is intuitive.
Temptations
A small permission to do the easy, worse thing.
Indulgences
Absolution for a sin already committed, no questions asked.
Curses
A minor affliction, served warm and entirely deniable.
Bureaucracy
Official paperwork that resolves nothing, on heavier stock.
Artefacts
A documented object that proves the small thing about you.
Malfunctions
A fault in ordinary life, certified and aimed at you.
New in the basement
Recently invented, largely to hit a quota.
The artwork is still at the engravers. The paperwork, as ever, was finished first.
Premium Corruptions
The corruptions that know where you live.
A little closer to home than the everyday stock, and priced as though that were a feature. Still absurd, still wrapped in paperwork, still funny. Just funny in the way that goes quiet for a second first.
Complete inventory
Everything in stock, lightly judged.
Reply-All Immunity Waiver Indulgence Work Absolution certificate Inspect 
Strategic Ambiguity Deck Temptation Work Presentation deck relic Inspect 
Meeting Overrun Permit Temptation Work Permit Inspect 
Chair Height Adjustment Warrant Curse Work Warrant Inspect 
LinkedIn Humility Polish Temptation Digital Life Cosmetic statement polish Inspect 
Main Character Filter Temptation Digital Life Worldview filter Inspect 
Unread Message Cloak Indulgence Digital Life Silence dispensation Inspect 
Group Chat Silence Seal Indulgence Digital Life Silence seal Inspect 
Password Reset Loop Rosary Infernal Bureaucracy Digital Life Devotional reset card Inspect 
The Screenshot Instead Of Bookmarking License Temptation Digital Life Bad archive licence Inspect 
Terms And Conditions Blinkers Indulgence Digital Life Consent waiver Inspect 
Laundry Reclassification Tags Evidence & Artefact Domestic Life Classification tags Inspect 
Dishwasher Tetris Licence Temptation Domestic Life Loading licence Inspect 
Bin Night Prophecy Card System Malfunction Domestic Life Prophecy card Inspect 
Fridge Archaeology Permit Infernal Bureaucracy Domestic Life Excavation permit Inspect 
The Drawer Of Plausible Batteries Evidence & Artefact Domestic Life Authenticity card Inspect 
Kitchen Sponge Of Moral Ambiguity Evidence & Artefact Domestic Life Lab report Inspect 
Bedtime Momentum Inverter System Malfunction Domestic Life Incident report Inspect 
Tiny White Lie Starter Kit Temptation Social Life Starter kit Inspect 
Passive-Aggressive Gift Note Pack Temptation Social Life Gift-note pack Inspect 
Name Forgetting Affidavit Indulgence Social Life Affidavit Inspect 
RSVP Ambiguity Pass Indulgence Social Life Ambiguity pass Inspect 
Neighbour Avoidance Map Temptation Social Life Route map Inspect 
Restaurant Decision Diffuser System Malfunction Social Life Deadlock report Inspect 
Apology Deferral Voucher Indulgence Relationships Deferral voucher Inspect 
The Birthday Message Time Bomb Curse Relationships Emergency alert Inspect The Queue Selection Hex Curse Public Life Hex certificate Inspect 
Shopping Trolley Drift Curse Curse Public Life Affliction notice Inspect 
Parking Space Mirage Powder Curse Public Life Mirage report Inspect 
Weather App Betrayal Serum Curse Public Life Forecast betrayal notice Inspect 
Seat Recline Permission Slip Indulgence Public Life Cabin dispensation Inspect 
Public Printer Communion Wafer Infernal Bureaucracy Public Life Ritual receipt Inspect 
Free Shipping Threshold Compass Temptation Money & Consumer Compass Inspect 
Return Window Sands System Malfunction Money & Consumer Hourglass incident report Inspect 
Impulse Purchase Indulgence Indulgence Money & Consumer Purchase absolution Inspect 
Hobby Starter Confetti Evidence & Artefact Money & Consumer Enthusiasm receipt Inspect 
Good Person Ledger Evidence & Artefact Moral Accounting Ledger card Inspect 
Karma Rounding Calculator Temptation Moral Accounting Calculator Inspect 
Ethical Exception Stamp Temptation Moral Accounting Red stamp Inspect 
Infernal Compliance Rock Evidence & Artefact HellDesk Serialised case card Inspect 
Case Escalation Denial Letter Infernal Bureaucracy HellDesk Denial letter Inspect 
Warranty Of Eternal Non-Resolution Infernal Bureaucracy HellDesk Warranty certificate Inspect 
The Third-Use Mug Temptation Domestic Life Reuse dispensation Inspect 
One More Trip Denial Kit Temptation Domestic Life Grip-strain waiver Inspect 
The Good Scissors Relocation Charm Curse Domestic Life Missing-item bulletin Inspect 
The Passive-Aggressive Typing Bubble Temptation Digital Life Delivery receipt Inspect 
Algorithmic Confidence Spray Temptation Digital Life Contamination notice Inspect 
The Update Later Button Temptation Digital Life Deferral receipt Inspect 
The "We Should Catch Up" Voucher Indulgence Social Life Non-binding social instrument Inspect 
Doorway Goodbye Extension Pack System Malfunction Social Life Exit log Inspect 
Compliment Deflection Polish Temptation Social Life Response polish Inspect 
The Tiny Lie About Distance Temptation Social Life Travel affidavit Inspect 
Meeting Multiplication Spores Curse Work Containment notice Inspect 
Spreadsheet Confidence Tint Temptation Work Audit tint sheet Inspect 
The "Quick Question" Depth Charge Temptation Work Blast-radius diagram Inspect 
Status Update Incense Temptation Work Progress aroma card Inspect 
Subscription Barnacle Scraper Infernal Bureaucracy Money & Consumer Billing hull inspection Inspect 
Influencer Decontamination Wipes Indulgence Money & Consumer Autonomy wipe sachet Inspect 
The Review-Reading Sinkhole System Malfunction Money & Consumer Research captivity report Inspect 
Pedestrian Pace Randomiser Curse Public Life Street deployment map Inspect 
The Universal Apology Sticker Indulgence Social Life Apology decal sheet Inspect 
Universal Cable Tangle Starter System Malfunction Domestic Life Entanglement starter coil Inspect 
Cart Abandonment Nesting Doll System Malfunction Money & Consumer Checkout recursion doll Inspect 
The Deadline Compression Field Curse Work Temporal pressure field Inspect 
The Tiny Treat Justification Stamp Indulgence Money & Consumer Self-reward approval stamp Inspect 
The Premium Version Of Regret Indulgence Money & Consumer Premium remorse certificate Inspect 
Remote Control Sovereignty Deed Infernal Bureaucracy Domestic Life Sofa jurisdiction deed Inspect 
Household Chore Fog Machine System Malfunction Domestic Life Responsibility haze device Inspect 
Exit Strategy Smoke Pellet Evidence & Artefact Social Life Conversation escape pellet Inspect Nothing matches that combination. You are either remarkably well adjusted or not trying. Sin more broadly.
Satan's Shop is a parody novelty service. No souls are bought, sold, transferred, appraised, improved, or professionally harmed.